Denglish

Just when you thought we were done with winter markets. . .

The fifth and final Weihnachtsmarkt that we went to was at the headquarters of VW, the Autostadt.  While there was a Christmas market in the city center, most didn’t consider it to be a ‘real’ market.  Volkswagon, of course, wants to put its own touches on the tradition and put on quite a nice market.  One thing that set this market apart from the others, and one of my personal favourite aspects of Germans, is the use of English to be ‘hip’.  In my former German classes we always called the combination of English and German ‘Germish’, but as they refer to their language as Deutsch, to them it is ‘Denglisch’.  Please enjoy the following examples of ‘hip’ English from the speakers of Denglisch:

Sadly, there were no kits of how to make a zip line out of chewing gum, paper clips, and a bottle cap.

 

No, they were not made with hemp.

If you didn't believe he was a lord, he'd send his bunnies after you:

 PS: Totally a coincidence that the bunnies were there.  If you didn’t see it earlier, a previous blog of mine focused on the subject.

  

We decided to stop here for food.

Sadly, we didn’t heed their advice, but instead opted for a scotch egg.

 

The egg was . . . interesting . . . but at least it was warm on a very cold night.  Maybe it would’ve been better with some magic stars in it

Read it twice.  No, really.  It took me a couple of days to realize they didn’t intend for a mean angel to be sent.  Though, maybe all bets are off if an angel has to wear plaid.

False advertising.  Definitely had to wait.  Though the Bratkartoffeln were quite good.

 

We decided to stop here for a cupcake and hot cocoa to warm up.

Magic stars!!! (okay, just candy decorations)

 

They had a wonderful half chicken here.  Finger-lickin’ good!

Is anyone else out there reminded of the 1989 Ben Savage / Howie Mandel movie?  And should I be admitting this?

 

She must have been typecast.  The next one is for all of you who have been patiently waiting for some poor grammar:

 

(looks to the sky while shaking fists) PREPOSITIOOOOONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  

Eggs?  Horses?  Men?  Puzzles?

No, crepes.

(okay, maybe some eggs.  but, c'mon)

 Perhaps Germans aren’t familiar with the notion of seventh heaven, but you’d think a simple Google check on the TV show would suffice.

Similarly, I was told Americans must have more joy in their lives as we can be ‘on could nine’ while the Germans are only “auf eine Wolke”.

(“See, I’m fun to be around AND educational.” – Charles Sackett)

.

.

.

Finally, the ‘Tour de force’ of the signs:

 

 'Nuff said.

We didn’t eat here, but we saw this sign:

If you didn’t believe them, they had the cans to prove it:

To any soul brave enough to have haggis on a pizza, I commend you.

We ended our evening here with a nice glühwein.

Well, I hope you have enjoyed the English signs from the Autostadt Wintermarkt.  Next time, random winter scenes from the Autostadt.